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Ah I loved Hatchet. Adam Green did something outstanding with that movie. I loved Joel Moore in the film but to our surprise, he won’t return for the second film of the franchise. But there is good news, one of my favorite horror actress will be playing Marybeth, Danielle Harris, I love her to death. I’m hearing great things about Hatchet 2 and here we get 2 new posters of the film(thanks to dreadcentral):

Click on the images for a bigger view.

And to my surprise, this looks rather bland!! Just 2 Hatchets? That’s a total ripoff of the first poster lol. But I do think they look really really cool and I’m going to forgive the “ripoff” angle here because this is just a teaser.

Share what you think!!!

Director: Marcus Dunstan.

Cast: Josh Stewart, Michael Reilly Burke, Andrea Roth, Juan Fernรกndez, Karley Scott Collins, Madeline Zima.

Whats It About

Desperate to repay his debt to his ex-wife, an ex-con plots a heist at his new employer’s country home, unaware that a second criminal(The Collector) has also targeted the property, and rigged it with a series of deadly traps(and there were some ugly ass traps, mind you!).

‘The Collector, collecting!

The Pros

The best part of the movie is, the mindless fun we get. Filled with gore, a badass killer and a sympathy-worthy “hero”.

What made this “trapped in a house with a killer inside” film a success is that, THE WHOLE THING WORKED. In the countryside, a bigass house of a richass guy, escaping the tricky traps while not getting caught, it all felt natural and not forced. One can argue that this is not a original story or whatever but that’s the point. It doesn’t want to be taken as a oscar-worthy gem and knows what they are dealing with(unlike a LOT of movies lately) and gives us a mindless slasher(or torture porn or survival) flick. The film should not be judged by it’s originality, it’s the entertainment value that matters here. The bottom line is, the cat and mouse game was perfect entertainment!

“Cool!”

The use of different color schemes were fresh and interesting. Red, yellowish-green(mostly), blue, orange etc. it was really neat.

A moment now, should be taken to praise Josh Stewart. The guy did a bang-up job and he played one of the two characters in the movie I cared for. He reminds me a bit of Edward Norton though. However, I wish Stewart is taken seriously as an actor.

“One of the least lethal traps, another example of cool color schemes and a look at our hero.”

The Cons

How did The Collector prepare all those traps in such short time? Then again, one can argue he is in this line of business for a long time. So, maybe he is an expert by now?

To be honest, except for Stewart’s character and the little kid, I didn’t care for any of the others.

And why exactly was The Collector collecting, whatever it was that he was collecting(tough sentence but no spoilers!! ๐Ÿ˜€ )? I have no idea what the answer is.

Violence, Gore & Nudity

Yes, the there is more gore than there is violence. But Arkin vs. The Collector bit was awesome. As for the gore, think big! Yes, the gore-lovers is definitely gonna love this. And Madline Zima made me happy with her boob glory. And 2 other, sparse strip-club scenes.

” I swear to god, this photo is captured during the sex scene! Even The Collector had to lick his lips cuz of Zima’s hotness!”

Overall

Turn off the switch of your head/brain, take a drink, sit back and enjoy! That’s how you are gonna love it. Definitely an A for me.

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Director: Christopher Smith(Creep & Severance).

Cast: Melissa George, Liam Hemsworth, Michael Dorman.

What’s It About

A worthless mommy(Melissa George) who sucks at taking care of her child, and likes to sail overboard with her man-friends(I ain’t sure if this word exists ๐Ÿ˜ ) finds herself in a shitload of trouble when the yacht she sailed in hits a storm and is forced to board a ocean liner to get to safety. And apparently, she feels like she knows this place and more than everything, there is a lonely killer onboard.

The Pros

The premise of the whole movie is splendid. To avoid spoilers, I’m not elaborating much but it’s pretty interesting. Add some good acting and direction with that and obviously you’ll get a decent enough movie. I’m not that familiar with Melissa George but she did an outstanding job in this film. Michael Dorman and Liam Hemsworth backed her up in a good way.

This movie made me think. And there is these WTF moments that caught me off guard, and at some scenes I was like HOLY SHIT!ย  and I kept wondering what’s gonna happen next. The action is pretty neat and done in a nice way. There’s these moments when I didn’t know what’s going on and BOOM! Shotgun violence, the terror, the building-up tension, everything just worked for me.

I love angry ocean. When the mighty blue ocean is pissed and is ready to kick any sorts of ship’s ass, I find myself satisfied. In here, the director did a great job visualizing this scene.

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I know, what the fuck, right? Not Really, this is nothing compared to what’s coming.

The Cons

So, what’s the point then? The ending revealed us the mystery but what’s the point?

******MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD********
So, they are stuck in a time period and the whole thing is repeating over and over again. What happens to the rest of the world? What happens to the other people around who knows about them? I found myself very unsatisfied with the ending and was expecting a REAL SOLUTION. And there wasn’t any. This bothers me whenever I think of the movie.

Gore/Violence/Nudity

No gore. Quite a good amount of action movie type violence. No REAL nudity but Melissa George has got a nice pair of legs.

Overall

A very entertaining movie that kept me at the edge of my seat. The ending left me blank and asking for more. Great nonetheless. I’ll give this a 7 out of 10.

***UPDATE***

After watching for the second and third time, I picked up all the crazy little details and guess what, IMO, it deserves a 8.5/10 (A).

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Cast: Malcolm McDowell, Tyler Mane, Scout Taylor-Compton, Kristana Klebe, Danielle Harris, Hannah Hall, Danny Trejo, Bill Moseley and Sheri Moon Zombie.

(The girls I like is marked red ๐Ÿ˜‰ ).

What’s It About

(The movie basically begins after what I’ve stated below so it doesn’t count as spoilers)

The movie is about a creepy kid from a white trash family. He likes to torture animals and beat up human beings, anyways, he snaps on a halloween night when his mother’s out, he kills his abusive daddy and slutty sister along with her boyfriend. So he is sent to a place where psychos are locked up and is under the charge of Dr. Samuel Loomis. His condition turns bad with time and then he snaps even more, he doesn’t talk to anyone for 15 years and develops a mask making hobby, then when Loomis let go of him and moves on, an incident provides him a chance of escape and he does and thus begin the journey(or movie).

The Pros

I liked the tension or the premise of the movie, it’s creepy and terrifying and provides something scary, not that the movie is scary it just looks sort of intimidating as a horror movie.

Malcolm McDowell did good with his role. So, it is okay to say that he pretty much nailed the role. And also, this is the first time I liked Danny Trejo in something.

Tyler Mane nailed Michael Myers. He was so creepy and perfect that if I was one of his victims, I would’ve died before he could touch me. The mask of Myers worked very nicely.

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“Ain’t this creepy?

The Cons

Why the FUCK were the girls so annoying? I literally had a hard time listening to those hot girls. Why were they given such cheesy and annoying lines?

Are you kidding me? Scout’s character screamed and squealed so much for the last 30 minutes that I was temporarily deaf.

The movie was slow. Okay, don’t rush but a 2 hour long slasher flick is a little too much when you could’ve just omitted a few stupid things out.

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“You’ll should have demanded for a better script”.

The Violence/Gore

This one’s got some nice, disturbing and bloody kills.ย  Messy at times. Mmhhmm.

The Nudity

Yes, yes, yes. Danielle showed her goods, so did Klebe and Hall. The award goes to Danielle Harris though.

WHY!?!

This is the first movie I liked Trejo in, and his character was so good to Michael Myers, but why did he kill him? ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

The Overall Judgement

It was a fun enough horror movie which made one big mistake by being annoying, it is a major crime. It deserves a 57%(C+) from me. I expected more.

Reviews Pending.

ZMD(2010)[ADH]
Kill Theory(2010)[ADH]

List of horror movies of 2010 I’ve seen.

If you ever notice grade change, it's because I changed my mind after second watch :)

Dread (A)
Triangle (A)
The Crazies (A)
The Final (A-)
Shutter Island (A-)

Blood Creek (B+)
ZMD (B+)
Kill Theory (B)
The Fourth Kind (B)
Legion (B-)
Daybreakers (B-)
The Lovely Bones (B-)
Case 39 (B-)
The Reeds (B-)

Nine Dead (C+)
Lake Mungo (C)
Bitch Slap (C-)

Zone Of The Dead (D+)
Circle Of Ei8ht (D)
Open Graves (D)
Growth(D-)
The Graves(D-)

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